Blissford Voice Today » Issue 19 http://bvtoday.net covers the vale like the dew Sun, 01 Nov 2009 18:22:25 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.5 en hourly 1 Duck Dramas http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/duck-dramas/ http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/duck-dramas/#comments Sat, 12 Dec 1998 08:47:08 +0000 Editor http://bvtoday.net/?p=685 Boono Boon was draped in black crepe and residents tiptoed about making tea and talking in subdued voices as Blissfordians feared the worse. The Duck on Devil’s Island, Whipporwill Pond, was missing from his little slate chalet! Oh why, oh why, oh why couldn’t he sleep on the island where he would have been safe? And then, suddenly, sunshine again! Monsieur Reynard the Fox had not triumphed. And Blissford returned to dreams……

]]> http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/duck-dramas/feed/ 0 Oxford Scholar returns to Frogham http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/oxford-scholar-returns-to-frogham/ http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/oxford-scholar-returns-to-frogham/#comments Sat, 12 Dec 1998 08:45:54 +0000 Editor http://bvtoday.net/?p=683 Stephen White was spotted directing traffic at St. Mary’s Fordingbridge for the Cubs district Carol festival and all those who have difficult computations can rest easy as the area’s foremost mathematician has returned for the Christmas Break.

]]> http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/oxford-scholar-returns-to-frogham/feed/ 0 High Water At Watersplash http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/high-water-at-watersplash/ http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/high-water-at-watersplash/#comments Sat, 12 Dec 1998 08:44:44 +0000 Editor http://bvtoday.net/?p=681 Experienced locals were checking supplies of tinned goods as torrential rains washing off the Forest resulted in high tides on Ditchend Brook. Hugh and Sarah have taken delivery of a small fast boat at Bracken Cottage, in the event floods cut us off. Lots of festive foam on the Pipes, so they must be having fun up at Newgrounds.

]]> http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/high-water-at-watersplash/feed/ 0 Letter to the Editor http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/letter-to-the-editor/ http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/letter-to-the-editor/#comments Sat, 12 Dec 1998 08:43:17 +0000 Editor http://bvtoday.net/?p=679 Sir

As a long-standing reader of the Blissford Voice, I am writing to deplore the deterioration of standards of both spelling and grammar in recent issues. Surely educated people even from the farthest colonies know that a singular phenomenon is just that: a phenomenon (sic). And that “sporan” is spelt thus: “sporran”, except of course in the original Gaelic, which is not spoken this far south, except perhaps by certain fishy persons inhabiting the higher altitude parts of the village.

I sincerely hope that “The Voice” is not going to sink to the standards so long maintained solely by the Grauniad. Please ensure that future issues are adequately proof-read by persons of sufficient erudition, not under the influence of more alcohol than is necessary to enable to compose the text (even if that is a substantial quantity).

Yours pedantically,

Rear-Admiral Jason Argonaut, RN (retired)

]]> http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/letter-to-the-editor/feed/ 0 Blissford Cross http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/blissford-cross/ http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/blissford-cross/#comments Sat, 12 Dec 1998 08:40:05 +0000 Editor http://bvtoday.net/?p=676 Recent observations made during the Leonid meteorite showers have revealed that new and important Duck Wallows have been formed on the track leading up to the Chilly Hill conurbation. Preliminary investigations suggest that these mirror the stars of the Belt and Sword of Orion, observed under a Full Moon, even if some of them are a bit nebulous. An expedition of kilted experts to the heights of Hampton Ridge on the occasion of Hogmanay is clearly called for.

]]> http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/blissford-cross/feed/ 0 Lintels Groan http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/lintels-groan/ http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/lintels-groan/#comments Sat, 12 Dec 1998 08:38:02 +0000 Editor http://bvtoday.net/?p=674 Christmas invites are loading chimney breasts across the valley as the high social season approaches. Readers are reminded of the Editor’s Invitational on December 20th at 12:00. Marianne and Anna are keen to have further entries in the Best decorated Lambkin contest.

]]> http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/lintels-groan/feed/ 0 Mystery Mobile http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/mystery-mobile/ http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/mystery-mobile/#comments Sat, 12 Dec 1998 08:37:01 +0000 Editor http://bvtoday.net/?p=672 It isn’t clear whether the electronically operated light in the kitchen is supposed to fool us into believing that the Yellow Mobile is anything more than overflow parking for the nefarious activities at Malc’s Place.

]]> http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/mystery-mobile/feed/ 0 Tibby Silent http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/tibby-silent/ http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/tibby-silent/#comments Sat, 12 Dec 1998 08:34:56 +0000 Editor http://bvtoday.net/?p=669 All quiet at Moorcroft where Tibby is probably still swooning after the receipt her Bejtmanesque ode of love. The Admirable has been enjoying stiff walks and cold showers with Hardy as he waits impatiently.

]]> http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/tibby-silent/feed/ 0 Egg Surplus http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/egg-surplus/ http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/egg-surplus/#comments Sat, 12 Dec 1998 08:32:46 +0000 Editor http://bvtoday.net/?p=667 There is still a suspicious egg glut at Hen Haven for those with Egg Nogg recipes.

]]> http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/egg-surplus/feed/ 0 High Sheriff Returns http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/high-sheriff-returns/ http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/high-sheriff-returns/#comments Sat, 12 Dec 1998 08:30:03 +0000 Editor http://bvtoday.net/?p=665 Ann is back at the Blissford Dairy for all those last minute milk products.

]]> http://bvtoday.net/1998/12/12/high-sheriff-returns/feed/ 0