Blissford Voice Today » Issue 221

Happy Easter! Lambs at Moorcroft

Thomas — Sat, 19 Apr 2003 15:53:44 +0000

Midwives were busy last week-end as the lambing season in Blissford got into full swing. Three new in the Blissford flock.

“Le Tout Blissford”

Thomas — Sat, 19 Apr 2003 15:53:04 +0000

Remarked the Fully Dressed Chef, a vision of demi-mondaine chic; as she and the Squire swept off to an evening at Mottisfont. The highlight at Brook Farm was the formal Cockerle Gifting ceremony, which according to local tradition must take place with all incomers. The elegant Chicken Supremo had come with an equally elegant Thai basket and magnificent cockerle to present.

Mike was heard to say they had drained the pond and that he had 4,000 gallons of fertiliser water to share.

The High Sheriff, Naked Pilot and Claire all but missed curtain raising at the Memorial Hall where Forest Forge were offering dramatic theatre.

FTFV (looking splendid on her new boyish destrier Friday) hopes to host the Vale and is having a garden party on the evening of June 21st 2003, at Bow Cottage, Horsington, Templecombe, Somerset. Only about an hour in the charabanc, come for 7:30. All welcome – no NFI’s!!

There is a fine selection of serving trays and plates at our front door. New Chicks at Frogham Mount

Three chicks were chalked up on the Darnley Saturday night. Late breaking – the Leith Cow broke out, left for Ogden’s where she was seen entertaining another herd, so they are down one on cattle. Alexander Celebrates

Donald Leith and Jonathan Adshead gathered to help celebrate a 14th birthday with some fast corners at Wessex Cartway (largest in indoor circuit in Europe!) Small Ads – Needed for one week July 10 -20th Thule Roof box or similar to fit Peugeot estate for five sensible women on 50s trek to Western Loire. Let Jude know if you can help. Vintage Spotted – Martin and Chrissie were touring in their antique open roadster with a host of buddies in a rally last week.

Right to Reply

Thomas — Sat, 19 Apr 2003 15:52:02 +0000

Further to assertions made in this week’s Blissford Voice about the lack of recent correspondence from the RWG, my client would like to assure the the good vale folk of Greater Blissford that he just living up to the “reclusive” nature that his name suggests. He is also keen to remind readers that any emails sent to an address @bvtoday.com, further to a well publicised announcement almost twelve months previously, will not be received, and that correspondees should use the bveditorial@shepline.com address to reach him.

As regards the lack of recent updates to the online service that is BVToday, my client is apologetic for any inconvenience caused and promises to update the pages as soon as possible. He would however, like to remind readers that they can now read much of the entire catalogue of back issues of The Voice. He would also like to inform patrons that he really has been terribly busy updating the parent site of www.shepline.com , including recently becoming an Amazon Associate, and working round the clock on preparing the groundwork for this years forthcoming (and brand new!) One BLOG Summer 2003!! Yours respectively, Mr V I Portant (Solicitors to the Web Genii)

In demand re-prints…… (March 2002) taken off the website….thanks RWG!)

The Fully Dressed Chef: Cooking with Tractors

Thomas — Sat, 19 Apr 2003 15:49:40 +0000

Apparently there is great deal of interest locally in cooking with tractors. Now of course it will be difficult to give recipes suitable for all makes, but certainly these broad principles will work with the major brands like John Deere, Massey Ferguson and Fordson. You will need:

some swarfega, the big tub with the pump, as cooking can be greasy.
a big roll of heavy duty foil.Â
some light pliable wire
a ring mold & a tractor

The principle is straightforward. Decide how long you will be running the tractor and over what sort of ground. With a long bout of good hot work on hilly terrain you could easily poach a salmon with dill in butter sauce. If you were just topping a small field, then perhaps just beef burgers ‘n onions is possible.

Then examine your tractor. What you want to do is to design a one pot dinner that can gently steam while you are harrowing.

For example a Belgian carbonnade of beouf in beer. Some good small chunks of Blissford beef, fresh herbs and spices, some pots, carrots, a good glug of beer, some onions and a little of whatever else you fancy and you are ready!

Take two sheets of foil at least a metre by a metre and place them in a big bowl or on a tray so no liquids will leak out. Place all your ingredients in the dimple and then carefully wrap the parcel with a good french roll, then roll the sides. Do the same with the second piece of foil so your gourmet dinner is securely wrapped twice. Secure it with the wire leaving long ends so you can fasten this succulent package to the hottest part of the tractor you can find and you are away. With a little adjustment and experimentation you find it easy to insure that after a long dusty day with the disc harrow, dinner is ready!

What about the ring mold I hear you cry? Use your tin snips to take out the middle and use it to warm buns (it sits on older models) over and around the chimney!

Get to know your tractor. Look for the niche that will hold some of those big foil wrapped King Edwards. The wires from the distributor might hold a nice tureen of fresh mushroom soup and so on. Avoid moving parts!

With experience you^ll be able to comfortably defrost joints, gently fibrillate a deep rich wine gravy or produce a stomach soothing emince de veau a la creme to astonish friends at the Big Straight Furrow competition.

The tractor is just the Aga of the Fields!

Enjoy!

next week: Oysters Tracta Rockafella(see photo)

“I think the fondue pot came off around here!”

Thomas — Sat, 19 Apr 2003 15:48:16 +0000

Mad A did have plans to host a Tractor and Fondue party, but found she got too tired running and there seemed to be a significant risk of tripping and falling on your fondue fork. The Baron was concerned that that his pride and joy smelt more like a Welsh Rarebit than a Deere and was worried about invalidating his power train warranty.

Mad A was philosophical. “Funny how things you do on holiday in the Alps just aren’t the same at home. Still….. “, she added sprightly, we did manage to get Fritz out from Eloise’s cellar for a week!”

BVT Herd Movements (Official)

Editor — Sat, 19 Apr 2003 15:47:32 +0000

Monday: After an attempt at Steep Hill the herd rested outside John and Penny’s and then aided by the staggered runway lights outside Springhill taxied down past Moorcroft to Blissford Cross, then settled for the night at Yewhurst lulling the inhabitants awake the next morning.

Tuesday: at dusk the boys were nose deep in Claire’s hedge at the Watersplash.

Silk Cut Report

Thomas — Sat, 19 Apr 2003 15:46:52 +0000

There is no update from the High Herbalist who has now been in his cleverly concealed hide (its a mix of verbena and aloe) for three nights.

Yodelling Heard

Thomas — Sat, 19 Apr 2003 15:45:53 +0000

Rachel (from Treetopper Castle) was curious about the melodious yodelling heard from down the alp. It seemed to emanate from the Secret Coop at Hillside and she was curious to know why Penny was bringing substantial breaded veal meals out to the coop in the dark. Any news?

Great Ghosts of Blissford series #4: The Lost Schilehrer of Letch

Thomas — Sat, 19 Apr 2003 15:44:37 +0000

Said to have been kidnapped and brought to Blissford by over enthusiastic punters from lower Frogham during a ski break in the Alps, his lyrical “bendey zee neezies” can be heard wafting through the gatehouse at the Mount, where he was incarcerated below stairs, with the skis and boots; clad only in a pair of ski mittens.

Ladies of a frail disposition are advised to close their eyes when he demonstrates the schuss. He arrived too late for ghosts no. 5., which explains the mellifluous yodelling if there is a snow fall. Could be mistaken for a berserk hitchhiker by out of towners as he stands by the roadside in his worn lederhosen with his digit out. Robust local ladies advise newcomers to just lower the sun visor and accelerate as they activate the central locking unless they are interested in being taught the “gelandesprung’ (a sort of Austrian spread-eagle in the air).

Eloise took the precaution of telling the renters she had an eccentric neighbour before she left, wearing an Austrian ski school badge on her fetching ski outfit.